Suddenly those long days and even longer nights of feedings, sickness, loneliness, and crippling fatigue seem farther and farther away.
And while I don't wish to cast those times in a rosy light- they were truly difficult- I am a little brokenhearted that they are gone.
As a middle school teacher, every day I am privy to the successes and the tragedies of our youngest teenagers. For this reason and more,I am scared for them to go to school- scared of the rejections and disappointments they'll face. They'll realize that our voices are not the only ones to heed, that the acceptance and love they have at home may not be reciprocated by those they meet.
So before we meet those challenges, before I dissolve in tears at thought of the experiences our kids will face- challenges that I may quite honestly know nothing about and have never experienced, I wonder. How do we preserve the magic of childhood? How do we freeze time for a few moments each day and stop demanding that our kids grow up. Sometimes I think that I've confused responsibility with maturity.
For their birthday this year, we are having a pirate themed party, largely inspired by their new found love of Jake the Pirate, a kid's show based (quite loosely) on Peter Pan. Lilly is so excited to "be" Izzy, the only girl pirate on the show. Izzy wears a necklace with pixie dust that Tinkerbell gave her to use in the event that they need to fly away as they evade the infamous Captain Hook. She is so excited for her costume to come in the mail and is CONVINCED that she'll have her very own pixie dust to wear and use. I have tried to explain to her that the pixie dust isn't real and that it will only make you fly on the show. For all the money in the world, I wish I could have bought her real pixie dust. She looked confused and was so disappointed.
So before they grow older, before they become as practical as we are, how do we restore a little magic?
This year we did Elf on the Shelf. We bought a less-creepy version of the traditional Elf and explained that because the Elf loved Christmas so much, he wanted to visit us every day and see what kinds of Christmas preparations we were making. Occasionally our Elf got himself into mischief as he hung around our house at night. Steve ingenuously explained that it was like Toy Story where all the toys come alive when the children are absent. I was mostly skeptical that we could pull this off, but in the end, it was one of the most precious experiences we've had with them. At first they were a little confused, but as they checked on him each morning, their confusion turned to delight. They'd laugh at his clumsiness or shake their head and say, "Oh boy, look at the mess Buddy made!"
Over Christmas break, Steve began regularly reading to the kids for a long period of time each night in their room right before bed. They started with a classic: original Winnie the Pooh, and they've since moved on to classic Christmas stories (Polar Express is a favorite), Toy Story chapter book, Thomas the Train books, Good Night, Good Night Construction Site and other wonderful stories. Steve calls them imagination books because at bedtime they have to lay quietly and listen instead of looking at the pictures. I can see their little minds working as they listen and see their faces as they grin. It's beautiful. (Until they realize it's the last book of the night, then there's a predictable meltdown.)
Yesterday we left the house a mess as we grabbed their scooters (and Thomas, of course) and drove to a nearby park to do some "scootering" as they say. It was cold, and our hands and faces were red after only 10 minutes, but I realized that I missed having fun with them. Since returning from Christmas break, work and other commitments have been overwhelmingly preoccupying. It was nice to enjoy their childish laughs and impatient complaints as they longed to jump from the car and speed away.
So here's to magical moments with your kids: late summer nights outside, cuddling on the couch, art projects gone awry, sloppy kisses, impromptu dance parties, sing-offs in the car, "helpers" in the kitchen, and for the little hands that reach for yours.
Coming soon:
Pictures from the holidays!
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